You have reached your limit of free articles this month.

Enjoy unlimited access to myAJC.com

Starting at just 99¢ for 8 weeks.

GREAT REASONS TO SUBSCRIBE TODAY!

  • IN-DEPTH REPORTING
  • INTERACTIVE STORYTELLING
  • NEW TOPICS & COVERAGE
  • ePAPER
X

You have read of premium articles.

Get unlimited access to all of our breaking news, in-depth coverage and bonus content- exclusively for subscribers. Starting at just 99¢ for 8 weeks

X

Welcome to myAJC.com

This subscriber-only site gives you exclusive access to breaking news, in-depth coverage, exclusive interactives and bonus content.

You can read free articles of your choice a month that are only available on myAJC.com.

breaking news

Georgia schedules its first execution of the year

Crazy presidential race collides with crazy Las Vegas for final debate


The first presidential debate created an unexpected furor over fat shaming and a former Miss Universe.

The second one featured more talk of unwanted male groping than of unsecured borders.

How could Wednesday night’s third and final debate between Hillary Clinton and Donald Trump possibly top all of that?

Vegas, baby!

That’s right, the Siegfried and Roy of presidential politics are taking their act to Sin City. The 9 p.m. debate takes place at the University of Nevada, Las Vegas.

Or does it, hmm … ?

Given how often things spiral out of control in Vegas and the whole Welcome to Crazytown feel of this election, here’s how things are more likely to go down at Debate No. 3:

1. Trump and Clinton will face off in a boxing ring at Caesar’s Palace. If it was good enough for Hagler v. Hearns and Hagler v. Sugar Ray Leonard (twice!), then surely it’s good enough for the two candidates trying to knock each other out to become Heavyweight Champion Leader of the Free World. As an added bonus, scantily-clad ring card girls will announce each new round of questioning by the debate’s moderator, “Fox News Sunday” host Chris Wallace.

2. Wayne Newton will be the debate’s co-moderator. As Anderson Cooper and Martha Raddatz proved during the second debate, you really need two moderators to try and keep the candidates in line. And Newton is “Mr. Las Vegas” (it says so right there on the “Mr. Las Vegas” tab on www.waynenewton.com). While Wallace keeps Trump and Clinton on topic, Newton will keep an eye on the clock and loudly start singing his signature hit “Danke Schoen” (“Thank you!”) whenever someone goes over their time limit.

3. TV’s “audience reaction meters” are out, slot machines are in. It’ll be good riddance on Wednesday night to those EKG-like “trend lines” that snake up and down onscreen as groups of captive viewers react live to the candidates’ answers. Instead, CNN and other networks will opt for the one-armed bandit effect. The focus group doesn’t like what Hillary or The Donald has to say about, say, nuclear weapons? Three lemons will fill the screen. But maybe they love someone’s response on immigration? Then it’s “JACKPOT!”’s, flashing lights and free drinks all around for Wolf Blitzer and crew.

4. The post-debate “spin room?” It’s now an all-you-can-eat buffet. How better to silence both candidates’ endless supply of spinners, surrogates and insufferable hangers-on than by encouraging them to stuff their pieholes full of waffles, prime rib and mini-eggrolls at the official mascot of Nevada, the casino buffet? Sorry, Sean Hannity and Lester Holt, they just brought out the chocolate fondue fountain. Check back for spin tomorrow.

5. What happens in Vegas won’t stay in Vegas. Sigh. Whatever else happens Wednesday night, one things for sure. We’ll hear all about it as soon as it’s over. And we won’t stop hearing about it until November 8th.


Reader Comments ...


Next Up in Local

Cobb County restaurant inspection scores

Cobb County • B&B Fish and Wings, 4400 Brownsville Road, Powder Springs. 91/A • Jade Palace, 2647 Cobb Parkway, Atlanta. 80/B • Mas & J International Restaurant, 5590 Mableton Parkway, Mableton. 99/A • Scott’s Eats & Sweets, 1150 Veterans Memorial Highway, Mableton. 86/B • Rotana Restaurant and Lounge, 585 Franklin Gateway...
Gwinnett County restaurant inspection scores

Gwinnett County • Panera Bread, 3280 Holcomb Bridge Road, Norcross. 100/A • Progress Deli, 1000 Hurricane Shoals Road, Lawrenceville. 100/A • Seoul Restaurant, 3585 Peachtree Industrial Blvd., Duluth. 94/A • Villa Italian Kitchens, 5900 Sugarloaf Parkway, Lawrenceville. 85/B • Xins Chinese Cuisine, 3940 Buford Highway, Duluth...
In the aftermath of Trump election, guns sales, carry permits drop
In the aftermath of Trump election, guns sales, carry permits drop

Donald Trump’s election was widely hailed as a victory in the gun rights community, where he was embraced for his staunch support of the Second Amendment. But when it comes to the gun industry’s bottom line, the Republican president has been bad news. The National Rifle Association’s annual meeting arrives in Atlanta on Thursday amid...
Clayton County restaurant inspection scores

Clayton County • Full Bellies Grub & Go, 6777 Mount Zion Blvd., Morrow. 92/A • J.R. Wings & Things, 5731 Trammel Road, Morrow. 98/A • Jamba Juice, Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport, Atlanta. 90/A • New China Wings, 1174 Forest Parkway, Morrow. 96/A • TGI Friday’s, Hartsfield-Jackson International Airport, Atlanta...
Newton County restaurant inspection scores

Newton County • Alby’s Pizza, 8105 Washington St., Covington. 95/A • Bullritos, 10327 Industrial Blvd., Covington. 96/A • El Charro, 3165 Elm St., Covington. 87/B • Tava’s Diner, 6154 Washington St., Covington. 96/A • The Depot Sports Bar & Grill, 4122 Emory St., Covington. 90/A
More Stories